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Is Fantasizing About Someone Else During Sex Considered Cheating?

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September 30, 2013 by The ReadyWriter


Of course it is!!

For some men, it’s hard to even imagine that you could possibly be thinking of someone else while he’s having sex with you…but it happens, more often than you think.

So when this happens why feel guilty about it? Because it’s considered cheating that’s why. When you are making love to your partner, you are suppose to be mentally, emotionally and physically vested; heart, mind, body and soul. The fantasy should only be for the person with whom the loving making occurs, with enhanced passion.

It’s okay for your mind to wander into the fantasy realm from time to time, but what does this say about your relationship? If you’re still pining after your ex and thinking of him/her while you’re having sex, then maybe there’s a problem. And it’s really a sign of trouble if there are some other disconnect happening beforehand, where the thought of you being with your partner physically; is emotionally or mentally agonizing, stressful and an act of pretend.

I hope I was able to answer this question based upon an email received over the weekend.

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69 thoughts on “Is Fantasizing About Someone Else During Sex Considered Cheating?

  1. Adam says:

    I thought the fantasy kept it hot. 😆

    Like

  2. Natasha says:

    Mm my mind would wonder when I was with my ex. I guess that’s why he’s now my ex. 😆

    Like

  3. Acquitta says:

    It’s not cheating, but it’s a red flag. Fantasies about someone else is one thing, but fantasizing about someone else DURING sex with your partner could mean something is wrong in the relationship. *_*

    now which one a y’all send Trace the email. Raise ya hand high and hold that shit up in da air so I can see ya! 😆

    Like

    • Floridagirl says:

      It’s not cheating, but it’s a red flag.
      ———
      If my man’s mind is somewhere else while we’re “doin it” hell yea that’s cheating!

      Like

      • Tamala says:

        It’s not cheating, but it’s a red flag.
        ———
        Uh huh. Really? Well, if you like using someone’s name while having sex, you’d better be careful not to say the wrong one because it would have the same effect as if you’d cheated.

        Like

      • BillyBoy says:

        Really? Well, if you like using someone’s name while having sex, you’d better be careful not to say the wrong one because it would have the same effect as if you’d cheated.
        __________

        True because if you thinkin bout someone else you might slip and say they name too. Oh hell Nah!!!!

        Like

      • Mrs. Hawthorne says:

        It’s not cheating, but it’s a red flag.
        ———
        I disagree IMO it is cheating

        Like

      • Joanne says:

        It’s not cheating, but it’s a red flag.
        ———

        It is!!!!

        Like

      • Rezzie says:

        It’s not cheating, but it’s a red flag.
        ———
        Thinking about someone else while with your wife/husband is adultery.

        Like

      • Katman says:

        It’s not cheating, but it’s a red flag.
        ———
        Nah it’s cheating cause you want that other person. not the one you with.

        Like

      • Lilly says:

        rue because if you thinkin bout someone else you might slip and say they name too. Oh hell Nah!!!!
        ——————
        Exactly! And when and if you’re really into it’s bound to happen.

        Like

    • BBallen says:

      It’s not cheating, but it’s a red flag.
      ———
      Oh hell yes it is Ion know what the fuck you wanna call it.

      Like

    • CoCo says:

      It’s not cheating, but it’s a red flag.
      ————
      Of course it’s not cheating, but it’s not cool either.

      Like

    • Cameo says:

      It’s not cheating, but it’s a red flag.
      ———
      When you are with someone else in ya mind during sex that is cheating! you can’t dress that shit up fa nothing

      Like

    • Zenna says:

      It’s not cheating, but it’s a red flag.
      ———
      Oh it is cheating it’s called emotional cheating…thoughts/actions that you want manifested with someone else. sorry!

      Like

    • Aceman says:

      Really? Well, if you like using someone’s name while having sex, you’d better be careful not to say the wrong one because it would have the same effect as if you’d cheated.
      __________

      Yo I just said the same damn thing!!! when you want somebody bad and you have to envision you wit the real one you wanna be with.

      Like

  4. Anthony says:

    I wish a chick would wonder off mentally while I’m all in it…..I’d tare shit up!!!!!!

    Like

  5. Miss Ang says:

    Whoa!!!!!!!!!!!
    I think this happens more often and never ever talked about. Well only amongst women.

    Like

  6. Sane says:

    Hail I use to feel kinda guilty but man the person I imagined made it much more exciting! 😆

    Like

  7. SoldierBoy says:

    I used to do it all the time and I don’t feel bad. It was casual sex though 😡

    Like

  8. UncleEd says:

    We have sex a MIN of 5 times a week. So, yeah, to get me in the mood sometimes I would imagine someone else cause sex with the same person almost everyday for 7 years can get boring. 😆

    Like

  9. Nicole says:

    I’m going to assume this post is for the married folk cause our girl Tra does NOT and I repeat does not promote premarital sex! 😆

    Like

  10. Yvonne says:

    Ladies, if this is the case it’s best to keep it to yourself that you’re fantasizing about some other man during sex. And vise versa, I don’t care to know who my man is fantasizing about instead of me.

    Oh hell No!!

    Like

  11. Ashanti says:

    It’s really no different than role playing. You ain’t no damn cheerleader, and he ain’t no damn fireman.

    Like

  12. BillyBoy says:

    Shiiiid I put in work, and would be highly disappointed if that was the case in my relationship.

    Like

  13. CorporateBitch says:

    Who has time to think about sex with another man?…Oh that’s right…the ones who are not having good sex with the one they are with. Work on the problem people. Work on the problem. 😆

    Like

  14. AlScream says:

    I was really working my girl last night (i mean going at it good) and I asked her if she wanted to bang one of her exes and she let out a moan that you wouldn’t believe. It turned me on and i really gave it to her. Then she told me to think about the best cookie that I ever had. Etc. Just wild sex talk. That’s all. We do it all the time and will never cheat. It’s ok to get kinky people.

    Like

  15. BBallen says:

    If she is fantasizing about someone else she better keep that shit to herself. !

    Like

  16. AppleBottom says:

    I’ll keep it to myself. i’m still married 😆

    Like

  17. Gia says:

    Hell, I did it for 7 or 8yrs….with the trash i was with. Lmao. 😆 I should of told his aSS. I would of probably gotten rid of him sooner.

    And please don’t judge me Fam, he was a horrible man.but hey I lived and I learned.

    Like

  18. Gabriella says:

    That’s why we role play and play fantasy games in bed sometimes. Yes, it does get a little boring with same person every night. And two kids? Ugh. That’s why you got to mix up it, buy some toys, and explore fantasies.

    Like

  19. CoCo says:

    You can trust n believe if there is another man on my mind I’ll never tell him. Telling him is like a death wish, ego ruin-er and relationship killer! Erbody aint into that freaky lets role play shit!

    Like

  20. Cameo says:

    Is Fantasizing About Someone Else During Sex Considered Cheating?
    ******
    nah that just means ya significant other is WACK…WEAK and AINT SHYT

    Like

  21. Cameo says:

    I hope I was able to answer this question based upon an email received over the weekend.
    ————
    so who asked the question??

    Like

  22. Kayla says:

    Is Fantasizing About Someone Else During Sex Considered Cheating?
    ******
    What it means is that you would rather be with someone else, but perhaps you are with this person because he pays the bills or u just have a lot of time invested in them, but whatever the case may be if u are having sex with your partner and envisioning someone else, yes it is considered cheating people!

    Like

  23. Zenna says:

    Is Fantasizing About Someone Else During Sex Considered Cheating?
    ******

    LOL 😆 if it’s not considered cheating then u are well on your way!

    Like

  24. Aceman says:

    They say if u can’t love the one u want, you better love the one you’re with…I say just don’t let the wrong name slip. 😆

    Like

  25. ManUp says:

    I never think of anyone else but the person I’m getting it in with.

    Like

  26. Donte says:

    Does Master-baiting count? 😆

    Like

  27. Donte says:

    I never think about a significant other while Master-baiting 😆

    Like

  28. DHood says:

    As long as you don’t scream out the object of your secret fantasy’s name while boning, (or gettin’ boned), then “NO”, it’s not cheating.

    Like

  29. Tammy says:

    Is Fantasizing About Someone Else During Sex Considered Cheating?
    ******
    It depend on if you have slept with that person before that your fantasizing about or have the chance to sleep with that person

    Like

  30. Mrs. Hawthorne says:

    Is Fantasizing About Someone Else During Sex Considered Cheating?

    Of course it is!! Thoughts become a want and desire and then you want to pursue that desire and make it a reality

    Like

  31. Joanne says:

    Is Fantasizing About Someone Else During Sex Considered Cheating?
    ******
    Of course not (^_^) side eye 😆

    Like

  32. Browngirl says:

    Well, I know I’ve done it many times.

    Like

  33. Henrietta says:

    Fantasizing about someone else isn’t a big deal just don’t tell him/her

    Like

  34. Rezzie says:

    Is Fantasizing About Someone Else During Sex Considered Cheating?
    ————-

    When you live by the rules of God, you follow the laws of God when you donot it’s a problem, it’s adultery; Matthew 5 verse 28 But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.

    Like

  35. Val says:

    Yes, it’s cheating

    Like

  36. Harlem says:

    I thought fantasizing about someone else while you’re having sex with your mate meant you’d rather be with that other person? Just seems like you’re not into the person you’re Fawking 😆 and yeah that’s cheating why? because you’re not being true to yourself or true to your convictions. Nor true to the person you’re screwing.

    Like

  37. Danny says:

    Is Fantasizing About Someone Else During Sex Considered Cheating?
    ————-
    NO, OF COURSE NOT, BUT ITS JUST NOT FAIR. U SIMPLY LOVE/WANT THE PERSON U ARE WITH OR U DONT AND URE INTO HIM/HER OR NOT. END OF STORY

    Like

  38. Xmen says:

    So this is what cha’ll been talking bout most of the nite? 😆 No it’s not cheating, if you keep it to yourself.

    Like

  39. Lexy says:

    Is Fantasizing About Someone Else During Sex Considered Cheating?
    ————-
    OF COURSE IT IS. THAT MEANS YOU’RE NOT INTO THE PERSON MENTALLY LET ALONE EMOTIONALLY AND THAT’S MESSED UP! I WOULDN’T WANT MY MAN THINKING ABOUT SOMEONE ELSE WHILE WE’RE IN THE ACT.

    Like

  40. QTip says:

    It’s cheating because the person you’re with should have you mentally, emotionally and physically.

    Like

  41. Civil says:

    ***SPOILER ALERT*** and DOUBLE STANDARD ALERT*** Men fantasizing about another woman due to we are visual beings, that’s why if you see any product that is geared to men, it always has a beautiful woman in that ad or commercial. It is something we do.

    Now women who fantasizing about another man and think about them when you are getting sexed, well either you’re not happy or not getting hit right. Unless you are fantasizing about a celebrity. Then you are really fantasizing, but if you thinking about dude at work or down the street, then you need to get out of that relationship.

    Like

  42. Katman says:

    Just don’t be a dumb=aSS and call the person’s name out like I did one time. smh

    Like

  43. Shawnia says:

    Yez Sir Ree Bob it’s called cheating! No ifs ands buts about it!

    Like

  44. Lilly says:

    To think of someone other than the person your making love too is cheating!

    Like

  45. Yasha says:

    so they shut the Gvnmt down to stop Aff.Hlth.Care Act? Wow!

    Like

  46. Felicia says:

    WoW!

    Like

  47. Daisy says:

    If my husbands mind was ON someone else during our lovemaking sessions, yes I would consider it cheating.

    Like

  48. Lisa says:

    Of course it’s cheating!

    Like

  49. Mahogany says:

    Hello!!!!!!!
    If he’s ontop of you and not into you MENTALLY um yeah it’s considered cheating

    Like

  50. 2Thick4U says:

    I wish a mofo would yell out another bitches name while he spose to be handling his business with me. That would be the last I rode space mountain with his A**

    Like

  51. Keisha says:

    Lol 😆 it’s nice to see where some of you stand regarding this issue. when you set your standards you will be treated better. so if you don’t consider your significant other thinking about somebody else while doin you than so be it! Me I ain’t havin it!

    Like

  52. SlickRick says:

    When you are making love to your partner, you are suppose to be mentally, emotionally and physically vested; heart, mind, body and soul. <– I CoSign that shit 100% if my girl was thinking about somebody else that would hurt me…Yes I consider it cheating! Oh hell yea I do!!!

    Matter fact I hope it wasn't my shorty who sent you the letter Trace asking you the question and hoping I would read about this shit!!! 😡 cause she know I love me some Trace!

    Like

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