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“The Secret (SEX) Life Of A Middle Aged Married Man”


This article is not only shocking but down right disgusting! A union is between a man and a woman, a husband a wife; for two are to unite not three. The third person in a marriage should be God, not another woman or another man. But in this article, this married man is in love with a man.

I’m a 57-year-old man. Fat. Bald. I have a wife I like. And a boyfriend I love. I’ve been “happily” married for over 37 years. Yet I’ve been leading a secret double life since I turned 50. In the age of Lady Gaga and her mainstream kink videos, a married man in love and having sex with another man is one of the final taboos. I used to think that myself. Nobody talks about it. There aren’t books or movies about it. It’s the ultimate closet.

What I’ve learned in these past few years is that men, even married men, can fall in love with men. A “bromance” can naturally involve touching and it’s completely normal. This is what men have been doing since the start of time, and what men are made to do.

I’m not going to feel bad about who I am — I did that for long enough. In the immortal words of Popeye, “I yam what I yam.” In the mortal words of Lady Gaga, “I was born this way.”

I will say it and say it again, YOU ARE NOT BORN GAY!!!! THAT’S A LIE FROM THE PIT OF HELL PEOPLE!!!! God is God and He is all-knowing… and God knew his intent in making woman for man, point-blank-period!

My boyfriend knows about my wife. She doesn’t know about him. Yes, it’s a problem that I’m married. It’s sad. I care for my wife and I don’t want to hurt her, which is one of the reasons why I’ve kept it secret for so long. I’m not putting her at physical risk, but the emotional risk is very real. I’m truly sorry about that.

So to hell with his wife, so what if she dies from aids or catch an STD, it’s about living a double life of fulfilling and satisfying a selfish need. Wow!

You’re not the same person at 50 you were at 20 (if you are you haven’t grown). So we are different people, stuck in the same institution.

I had been “curious” as a teenager and had one encounter with a friend. It wasn’t a good experience, I didn’t like it, so I convinced myself I never needed to do it again. Then I spent almost 30 years being faithful (the last 10 of those being celibate).

But if you’re curious, or at least not totally afraid of the idea of being with another man, those feelings never go away. Never. There are online support groups for married men who are curious, and that’s a constant. Once you have that urge, you always have that urge.

Sex is completely natural and normal for every creature on this planet — even sex among males. Sex feels good for a reason, and that reason isn’t solely so that we’ll procreate within the bounds of a marriage.

Sex is normal. Sex is natural. Sex is good.

Love is even better.

Even so, I wasn’t looking for love, I was looking for real male-bonding, friendship, a physical connection, and acceptance.

Once I was absolutely clear about that, I put a very specific ad on Craigslist and met another man looking for the same thing. I’ll go into details about this handsome, sweet, smart, funny, creative, kind, beautiful man soon.

Neither of us planned on falling in love. It wasn’t a decision or choice, it was a spiritual connection on the very deepest level. And for the first time in my life, it’s a complete love, spiritual, emotional and physical — and it’s completely honest, with no lies or omissions.

Love is a beautiful thing. And while I know that our love will hurt my wife, I also know it’s right. I know it with all my heart. And then maybe she can find real love, too.

If he was so in love with this man, he would tell his wife and set them both free; but instead he chooses to stay on the downlow in order to live an outward appearance of normality. I could respect him more if he was openly gay but he’s having the best of both his worlds with his double lifestyle.

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114 thoughts on ““The Secret (SEX) Life Of A Middle Aged Married Man””

    1. dayum men are fucking men. that’s a sad reality
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      a dangerous one too.

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      1. dayum men are fucking men. that’s a sad reality
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        as long as it’s not my man, we good!

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      2. I could respect him more if he was openly gay
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        Yeah but the problem with that is, he’s ashamed and “in the closet” and don’t wanna come out. yet when love is a secret it ain’t real. he’s blown by the butt-fucking with this man cause the sex is exciting! His wife and kids (if any) are his front. downlow homo’s are the worst kind.

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      1. The only thing I wanna understand is why IS he still married
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        many downlow men ARE

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  1. I don’t give a fuck that he’s sleeping with a man. The issue here is he’s violating his marriage by cheating on his wife. He’s a hypocrite talkin bout having a relationsh­ip that is honest and true, yet he’s cheating on his wife. GTFOH……confused ass!

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  2. “I used to think that myself. Nobody talks about it. There aren’t books or movies about it. It’s the ultimate closet.”

    Oh Nigga please!!!! Your situation is not special nor is it unique. Ever heard of being on the DL? Well that’s what you are fool!!!!! It’s been a known secret for quite some time and has garnered plenty of attention. Google it.

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    1. Downlow men disgust me!
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      they can’t do shit for a hetro sista such as myself. what a waste of good dyck.

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  3. He needs to tell his wife, and go be with his man, life is just too short not to live a true life and let her live hers.

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    1. He needs to tell his wife, and go be with his man, life is just too short not to live a true life and let her live hers.
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      I agree…But Joanne, nothing surprises me anymore. It seems that anything goes these days. My only hope is that his wife can come out of it all ok.

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      1. He needs to tell his wife, and go be with his man, life is just too short not to live a true life and let her live hers.
        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

        I agree…But Joanne, nothing surprises me anymore. It seems that anything goes these days. My only hope is that his wife can come out of it all ok.
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        oh c’mon now ya’ll the wife know she ain’t fuckin him but she knows somebody is.

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      2. Evening fam, while i agree with the sentiment that he should tell his wife and they should divorce, he does mention that they’ve been celibate for 10 years, so he’s not putting her at risk for HIV/AIDS.

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      3. Evening fam, while i agree with the sentiment that he should tell his wife and they should divorce, he does mention that they’ve been celibate for 10 years, so he’s not putting her at risk for HIV/AIDS.
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        You married but celibate in ya marriage? GTFOH oh hell yeah his wife know what’s up! she know he fuckin somebody, hell she might be too.

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      4. Evening fam, while i agree with the sentiment that he should tell his wife and they should divorce, he does mention that they’ve been celibate for 10 years, so he’s not putting her at risk for HIV/AIDS.
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        You married but celibate in ya marriage? GTFOH oh hell yeah his wife know what’s up! she know he fuckin somebody, hell she might be too.
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        I don’t believe this shit this nicca lyin. he fuckin his wife with that dookie dick and doing his fagot ass lover too. who gon be married and they man/woman ain’t fuckin them? this is bullshit

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      5. No sex in 10 years in a marriage? Mm I gotta call bullshit on that play also. The ultimate expression of love is “making love” to your wife. If I couldn’t make love to my wife then why stay with her? Makes no sense.

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      6. Given the procliviti­es of men – and the relative mortality of men vs. women, his wife is not likely to find someone else – especially if she takes a few years to recover from his betrayal.

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      7. I think it is important to note that women are not stupid his wife knows he’s either 1, GAY or 2. fuckin somebody else. and 10 years of no sex, they are no longer married their roommates. she know what time it is.

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      8. It should not matter that they didn’t have sex for 10 yrs, there are other forms of intimacy in a marriage, and maybe those just didn’t work. I guess we will never know since we only got 1 side of the story.

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  4. Some people have no morals at all whatsoever­.

    They are just rotten to the core. Me, me, me. Damn the consequenc­es. So then what??? You give your wife AIDS. Yeah, that was a great story. Infidelity and homosexual­ity in the same story as though this is some sort of uplifting “do what he did” to be happy sort of shit? Who is this nasty nicca anyway

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  5. Personally­, I don’t agree with the secrecy, and the guilt that it fosters. Granted, telling will likely create substantia­l distress initially and for years to come, but the relief from having to live falsely and the ultimate sense of satisfacti­on in knowing that one has been honest not only with him or herself, but with everyone involved should make the outcome easier in time.

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  6. You have str8 men looking for a good woman then you have downlow, gay monfuckers like this cheatin on theirs. If he was my bro-low i’d beat the shit outta him!

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  7. He’s full of shit point-blank-period!!!!! Leave your wife and live ya gay life dude. you’ve already left her mentally, emotionally and physically so make it official nicca and leave her for ya regular butt fucks on da real.

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    1. When sex is so good that you want to explore it outside the union of a marriage, you enter into a perverted realm and this is what is happening amongst these men. They become freaks and want to explore in uncharted waters. again it’s an abomination.

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  8. This is a mess but only more evident we’re living in the end days. Men with men and trying to justify it by saying animals are with animals of the same sex. Be not decieved people, God is not mocked!!!! Men with men is an abomination and if you don’t know the Word of God you’ll 4ever not know the truth!!!!

    Yes Ms. Bell the devil is a liar!

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  9. Tracy where you get this story from?
    A friend?
    A gay/downlow freind?

    LOL… 🙂

    Either way, he shouldn’t be telling us/you he should be telling his wife. Damn shame!!!

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  10. What this nasty ass is doing is really pretty disgusting!

    He needs to come clean with his wife – even if it’s only to agree that they BOTH are free to seek out other sexual opportunit­ies.

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  11. This dude is confused and the post kinda made me sick to my stomach. A love that’s created and that would cause another person pain created on a foundation of decietfulness is a false shell of love. He’s not in love, he’s just blown away by the sex with a man becuz it’s exiciting and different. He’s gross and I hope he suffers the consequences of his sctions.

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  12. He’s using two people… he’s a hurtful, decietful coward!!!! and that’s more disgusting than anything!!!!

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  13. Dayum!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Stories like this piss my ass off. As a single woman looking for a real man….looks like the most of them are gay, hell I don’t have a chance!

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    1. Dayum!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
      Stories like this piss my ass off. As a single woman looking for a real man….looks like the most of them are gay, hell I don’t have a chance!
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      woman is the enemy of the devil, so if he can destroy what God has intended for woman (which is man) that will turn many women away from the will of God.

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      1. Dayum!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
        Stories like this piss my ass off. As a single woman looking for a real man….looks like the most of them are gay, hell I don’t have a chance!
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        🙂 Lol @Gia.,
        There are only more women because they live longer, so if you’re under 50 the split is still pretty much 50/50. As for gay, homosexual­ity occurs in about the same percentage of females as it does in males, so that cancels itself out. You have a chance. You may just need to lower your standards or look in different places.

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      2. You may just need to lower your standards or look in different places.
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        Whatever you do NEVER lower your standards.

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    2. Gia,
      Most heterosexu­al men have zero interest in touching another men, in fact quite the opposite. fact about heterosexu­al men, which by definition like women and not men, is okay.

      Nonetheles­s — in today’s society where homosexual­ity is widely accepted, hiding behind a facade of marriage and/or children is archaic.This dude should have embraced who he was rather than take his wife as a hostage to protect himself.

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      1. Nonetheles­s — in today’s society where homosexual­ity is widely accepted, hiding behind a facade of marriage and/or children is archaic
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        I don’t think it (homosexuality) is widely accepted I think with all these new gay rights we as a society don’t have a choice because it’s thrown in our faces daily but no sweetie, it’s not accepted, it’s not accepted at all!!!

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  14. This post is ugh how could any man stick his “manlyness” into the ass of another man? I have no further comment.

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  15. He nasty. Dick slinging another man’s dick is just GROSS! And as for the wife, that shit is an excuse. Like Tra said, he want to keep the best of both his worlds. ugh. 😦

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    1. Not 2be judgemental but him, eddie long and a bunch of other downlow men, gon host hell wide open!!!
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      Eddie Long is a leader, there will be a special hell prepared for him he was able to decieve the masses which is far more worst.

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  16. a dick into another man’s ass is UN-NATURAL…a women playin in another woman’s pussy is UN-NATURAL…Dogs and cats fuckin the same sex is expected that’s why their called animals, they have to be trained and tamed and they do what comes natural as animals….but grown ass men and woman just running around fuckin each other yeah that shit is UN-NATURAL….And I don’t care which way you slice it the shit is sick!

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      1. Dogs and cats fuckin the same sex is expected that’s why their called animals, they have to be trained and tamed and they do what comes natural as animals….
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        Homos try to say that shit to justify fucking another man or woman on woman but it’s SICK all the same.

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      2. Dogs and cats fuckin the same sex is expected that’s why their called animals, they have to be trained and tamed and they do what comes natural as animals….
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        Homos try to say that shit to justify fucking another man or woman on woman but it’s SICK all the same.
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        I had a male dog name REX and he never went after another male dog. he would only smell the azz of female dogs. so i call bullshit on that theory.

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  17. To me, the opening sentence says it all. He “likes” his wife and “loves” his boyfriend.

    He’s living with the wrong person.

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      1. To me, the opening sentence says it all. He “likes” his wife and “loves” his boyfriend.

        He’s living with the wrong person.
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        Random,
        NO gay man is going to find another woman, any woman sexually appealing?

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      2. NO gay man is going to find another woman, any woman sexually appealing?
        **********

        cosign on the truth!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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  18. Justifying marrying someone to “hide” your gayness is the equivalent of marrying someone for money and crying that you were poor so you were “forced” to trap someone in your lie. This is so sad.

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  19. Another reason Gay Marriage has to be legal asap is so gay men and women don’t have to marry str8 people and ruin their lives.

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    1. Another reason Gay Marriage has to be legal asap so gay men and women don’t have to marry str8 people and ruin their lives.
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      @Queen, no-one forces anyone to marry anyone. This is one fucked up individual trying to JUSTIFY his sick downlow lifestyle. He should of came str8 with his wife the minute he betrayed her.

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  20. Because I love PUSSY connected to a fine ass black woman so much, I couldn’t stomach reading this post @Trace

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      1. I cosign @slick,
        if an ass is gone bend over in front of me, it’s gonna have some poo-nah-nah attached to it not a set of hairy smelly dookie ass balls.

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      2. family friendly blog
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        SHIIIIIDDD!!! Family n friendly left with this post…Any fags in this blog?

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  21. Sad and selfish but 2eaches own. and i don’t believe in homosexuality either. This story is very sad and disturbing.

    Good night fam.

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  22. Get out of the fucking marriage. Immediatel­y. Today. Yes, there will be pain but what he is doing is completely unacceptab­le. I’m no saint and I understand the impulse to screw around, though I don’t condone it. But if you are married and in love with someone else – male or female – that’s something else entirely different. He needs to end the marriage and move on. End of story.

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    1. Um, why is this fool still married to this woman?
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      he’s downlow gurl read it again!

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      1. Um, why is this fool still married to this woman?
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        he’s downlow gurl read it again!
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        Exactly and “in love” with another man. See if he was my man I’d have to kill his ass. You couldn’t fuck with me like that aw hell naw.

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      2. @Coco, if you marry me then DISCOVER you like fuckin men you better move to another continent cause i’ll get you for fuckin with my physical health and jeopordizing my life with ya dirty dick!!!!!!!!!!!

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      3. @Coco, if you marry me then DISCOVER you like fuckin men you better move to another continent cause i’ll get you for fuckin with my physical health and jeopordizing my life with ya dirty dick!!!!!!!!!!!
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        I would “LORANNA BOBBITT” his ass!

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      4. I would “LORANNA BOBBITT” his ass
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        Then mail the dookie dick to his lover

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    1. We all pay the price for the life we choose! And he’ll pay in one way or another.
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      I cosign., be it gay, a lesbo, a homo, bi, shy or for pussy you die! you’ll pay in the end.

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      1. I cosign., be it gay, a lesbo, a homo, bi, shy or for pussy you die! you’ll pay in the end.
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        LMMFAO 🙂 Ya’ll stooopid!!!!!

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      2. I cosign., be it gay, a lesbo, a homo, bi, shy or for pussy you die! you’ll pay in the end.
        *****************
        LOL 🙂 Funny

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    1. TREY GAY THAT’S ALL I GOTTA SAY!
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      and downlow another man’s HO

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  23. “If he was so in love with this man, he would tell his wife and set them both free; but instead he chooses to stay on the downlow in order to live an outward appearance of normality. I could respect him more if he was openly gay but he’s having the best of both his worlds with his double lifestyle.”

    I agree Ms. Bell…I agree!!!!!

    Like

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